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Joel Stein
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Man Made: In Which a Dad Learns to Be a Man for His Son Kindle Edition

by Joel Stein (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
4.4 out of 5 stars 166 ratings
The smudge looked suspiciously penis- like. The doctor confirmed: "That's the baby's penis!" which caused not celebration, but panic. Joel pictured having to go camping and fix a car and use a hammer and throw a football and watch professionals throw footballs and figure out whether to be sad or happy about the results of said football throwing.

So begins his quest to confront his effete nature whether he likes it or not (he doesn't), by doing a twenty-four-hour shift with L.A. firefighters, going hunting, rebuilding a house, driving a Lamborghini, enduring three days of boot camp with the U.S. Army, day-trading with $100,000, and going into the ring with UFC Hall of Famer Randy Couture. Seeking help from a panel of experts, including his manly father-in-law, Boy Scouts, former NFL star Warren Sapp, former MLB All-Star Shawn Green, Adam Carolla, and a pit bull named Hercules, he expects to learn that masculinity is defined not by the size of his muscles, but by the size of his heart (also, technically, a muscle). This is not at all what he learns.
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  1. Print length
    299 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Grand Central Publishing
  4. Publication date
    March 27, 2012
  5. File size
    3.0 MB
  6. Page Flip
    Enabled
  7. Word Wise
    Enabled
  8. Enhanced typesetting
    Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

From Booklist

When 38-year-old, self-confessed unmanly man Stein finds out he and his wife are having a baby boy, he is seized by the compulsion to learn how to do all that manly stuff he’s neglected. So he spends time with some firefighters (all the while hugely intimidated by their dazzling good looks); learns to love dogs (with the help of a former Playboy playmate); gets some lessons in the fundamentals of baseball (from a two-time MLB all-star); and spends a weekend as a Boy Scout (mentored by a 13-year-old named Wiggles). The author’s wife thinks his “manquest” is a stupid idea, but for Stein, it’s a necessary attempt to confront all of the things he’s spent his life avoiding and to learn some skills that will make him a better father to his little boy. It’s a very funny book, but it’s not really a comedy; it’s more like a cockeyed autobiography, an embarrassingly honest story of one man’s last-ditch effort to Become a Man. Most readers—and their female counterparts—will relate to the book in some way. --David Pitt

Review

"This is much more than a funny book, though it is that too. Beneath the humor is a wonderfully poignant exploration of the role of manliness for the 21st century urban guy. It's also a Father's Day love letter disguised as a set of adventure tales. Joel looks lovingly at both his crusty old dad and trusting infant son to reflect deeply on the lessons that we pass along from generation to generation. It made me laugh, and think, a lot."
 --Walter Isaacson, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Steve Jobs

"Many of us men in the Western world struggle with this "forced manliness"- there is a lot of pressure. For some, it is a real struggle. I have seen Joel try to chew tobacco in an attempt to prove that estrogen does not imprison his body. Looking down at his lap and bashfully wiping the remnants of spilled tobacco off his J. Crew slacks did not help his cause. The fact that he laughed at it, though, did. He caught himself trying to be manly and laughed. That is a true man." --Zach Galifianakis

"I am the father only of daughters, and so didn't suffer any existential midlife panic about discovering and demonstrating my latent manliness. But I am happy Joel did, because his infant son inspired him to report and write this rare and splendid thing: an open-minded, open-hearted, bracingly honest, laugh-out-loud-funny memoir that takes life just seriously enough."
--Kurt Andersen, New York Times bestselling author of Heyday

"Despite his best efforts, I'm not sure if Joel Stein will ever be a man, but he made me laugh out loud trying in Man Made." --Andy Borowitz, New York Times bestselling author and humorist

"Joel Stein is one of the funniest writers I've read. An incredible, hilarious saga of one man's transformation from really wimpy to just kind of wimpy." -Neil Strauss, New York Times bestselling author of The Game and Emergency

"Joel Stein's book will make you act in a very unmanly way-you will spend hours giggling like a 5th grade girl. He writes about fatherhood and son-hood with great insight, humor and, yes, even poignancy. It made me proud to share the same basic gender with him" -AJ Jacobs, New York Times bestselling author of The Year of Living Biblically

"If Joel Stein can learn to be a man, a man in the old and rugged sense of the word, then anyone can. And that's what gives me hope. What gave me profound and dizzy pleasure, though, was reading this wild account of how he did it. I dare you to follow him on his dangerous quest and I double dare you not to laugh." -Walter Kirn, New York Times bestselling author of Up in the Air

"This entertaining and irreverent memoir will make you laugh out loud, teach you a surprising amount about various bastions of American masculinity, and leave you feeling glad that you're not married to Joel Stein." -Curtis Sittenfeld, New York Times bestselling author of Prep and American Wife

"To man up, Stein goes all Plimpton . . . MAN MADE reminds us of his wonderful ability to find surprise within a cliché . . . hilarious."-New York Times Book Review

"Stein proves himself to be a champion humorist by probing the serious side of his subject while peppering the paragraphs with numerous fresh and funny notions."
-Publisher's Weekly

"A consistently hilarious and surprisingly profound crash course in manliness... Charming, funny and life affirming" -Kirkus

"Feels like what might've happened if you'd sent Woody Allen to write George Plimpton's Paper Lion...In between all the comedy, the book is often a perceptive account of how men relate to each other and a surprisingly tender story about the love that exists between fathers and sons." -San Francisco Chronicle

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B005SCSHP0
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Grand Central Publishing (March 27, 2012)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ March 27, 2012
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 3.0 MB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Not Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 299 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.4 out of 5 stars 166 ratings

About the author

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Joel Stein

Joel Stein

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JOEL STEIN grew up in Edison, NJ, went to Stanford, and in 1997, became a staff writer for TIME. In 1998, he began writing his sophomoric humor column that now appears in the magazine every week. He’s also written fourteen cover stories for TIME, and has contributed to The New Yorker, GQ, Esquire, Details, Food & Wine, Travel & Leisure, Businessweek, Fortune, Wired, Real Simple, Sunset, Playboy, Elle, Los Angeles, and many more, most of which have gone out of business. He has appeared as a talking head on any TV show that asks him, taught a class in humor writing at Princeton, and wrote a weekly column for the back page of Entertainment Weekly and the opinion section of the Los Angeles Times. This is the most he’s ever written in third person.

Customer reviews

4.4 out of 5 stars
166 global ratings

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Customers say

Customers find the book laugh-out-loud funny and entertaining, with one describing it as a hilarious heartfelt journey. Moreover, they appreciate its pacing, finding it introspective and surprisingly poignant, with one customer noting how it makes readers reflect on their childhood. Additionally, customers praise the writing style and authenticity of the book, while also appreciating its intelligence and cleverness.

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59 customers mention "Humor"59 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the book's humor, describing it as laugh-out-loud funny and extremely witty, with one customer noting its self-deprecating style.

"Joel Stein's MAN MADE is a collection of humorous, real-life essays with a common thread: the attempt to become a man worthy of fathering a son...." Read more

"...Bottom Line: Man Made by Joel Stein is a fun, hilarious read that peppers in enough poignant observations on character to be worth your time." Read more

"...I laughed out loud in every chapter, and especially in the chapter about shooting guns. I don't usually laugh out loud, so this is high praise...." Read more

"This is a wonderful book. So funny, so personal, and so real. The humor leads up to meaningful moments...." Read more

27 customers mention "Value for money"27 positive0 negative

Customers find the book to be a wonderful and entertaining read.

"...This attitude of contentedness, of working hard and getting a job done, not complaining when things don't go your way, feeds into that same self-..." Read more

"This is a wonderful book. So funny, so personal, and so real. The humor leads up to meaningful moments...." Read more

"...dealing with the discovery of a homeless man's body, these are great LA pages comparable with the best of Chandler or Jack Webb...." Read more

"...Great book. In a world with so much awful, bad comedy, gems and talents like this need to be praised." Read more

18 customers mention "Pacing"15 positive3 negative

Customers appreciate the book's pacing, finding it introspective and surprisingly poignant, with one customer noting how it makes male readers reflect on their childhood experiences.

"Joel Stein's MAN MADE is a collection of humorous, real-life essays with a common thread: the attempt to become a man worthy of fathering a son...." Read more

"...by Joel Stein is a fun, hilarious read that peppers in enough poignant observations on character to be worth your time." Read more

"This is a wonderful book. So funny, so personal, and so real. The humor leads up to meaningful moments...." Read more

"...It's smart, poignant, funny. And books don't break!" Read more

10 customers mention "Intelligence"10 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's intelligence, describing it as clever and insightful, with one customer noting how the author sees beauty everywhere.

"...That's what Ken sees, not value or practicality. He sees beauty everywhere. 4. Men put others first...." Read more

"...Listen folks, get and Kindle Version of "Man Made" AND a book. It's smart, poignant, funny. And books don't break!" Read more

"...Mr. Stein is clever and witty, and at first I really enjoyed the book. But I got to page 180 today and can't read the last hundred or so pages...." Read more

"..."Man Made" is a delightful, funny, engaging, charming, witty, honest, clever, fun book...." Read more

9 customers mention "Writing style"9 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing style of the book, noting that the author is a favorite columnist.

"...Unlike most of us he is a fantastic writer who delivers truth wrapped in a blanket of humor...." Read more

"I found book to be cleverly written. It is so funny and true. All men can take away some pebbles of wisdom from the humor...." Read more

"The author is a favorite columnist, so I was not disappointed with his descriptions of various situations encountered in raising a young boy...." Read more

"I find the subjects in the book were treated kindly and the memoir is well written and very funny as well as very introspective...." Read more

4 customers mention "Authenticity"4 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the authenticity of the book.

"...His book "Man Made" is a delightful, funny, engaging, charming, witty, honest, clever, fun book...." Read more

"I found book to be cleverly written. It is so funny and true. All men can take away some pebbles of wisdom from the humor...." Read more

"Man Made: A Stupid Quest for Masculinity What an honest and funny book about what masculinity means...." Read more

"...He is just so real and honest." Read more

Top reviews from the United States

  • J. Mayland
    5.0 out of 5 stars Funny - and surprisingly poignant
    Reviewed in the United States on August 23, 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Joel Stein's MAN MADE is a collection of humorous, real-life essays with a common thread: the attempt to become a man worthy of fathering a son. Stein already has a wide audience due to his columns for TIME magazine, The L.A. Times, and his frequent appearances on Real Time with Bill Maher and other shows. He's made a career of playing the character of a solipsistic yet self-aware loser.

    His quest to become a truly manly father is seemingly the perfect foil for this pose (or, perhaps, slouch). And Stein navigates the world of fireman, the marines, the boy scouts, and even high stakes finance, always making sure that he is the butt of the joke more than anyone.

    You'd be hard-pressed to read this book without laughing out loud a dozen times. My favorite was the line where he described going on a drive with a friend in an uber-manly Lamborghini: "We talked about marriage, fatherhood, monogamy, and pornography, and how much we enjoyed three of them."

    A few other reviewers have said that if you like Stein's column in TIME, you'll like the book, and I suppose that's true. If there's any knock on the book at all, it's that Joel seems to have become so ingrained in the rhythm of a 500 word back-of-the-magazine light hearted column, that his chapters have a tendency to wrap themselves up in neat conclusions a tad too readily. Every episode seems to be its own distinct thought.

    But I think there is something a little more profound at work. It's certainly true that the modern American man is struggling with his masculine identity these days. Gender roles are being redefined - we don't want to be like our baby boomer dads, but we haven't quite figured out what the alternative is yet. Stein's approach, however lightly comedic, is also confessional and, at times, starkly vulnerable. He gives his wife Cassandra a strong voice in the proceedings, and even bravely offers up a chapter about both his own father and his father in law. Stein paints himself up as the "pathetic" version of the modern male - full of self-doubt, self-loathing, and adolescent urges - while taking the reader on a tour through several modern macho archetypes - the real-life badasses. The truth of MAN MADE is that almost every guy - even the ones we paint as untouchable heroes - falls somewhere between those two poles.
    One person found this helpful
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  • JR. Forasteros
    4.0 out of 5 stars Hilarious and Thought-provoking take on Modern Manhood
    Reviewed in the United States on September 22, 2012
    Verified Purchase
    Fans of A. J. Jacobs and Matt Mikalatos, rejoice! When journalist Joel Stein (Los Angeles Times, TIME) found out he and his wife were having a boy, he had a massive panic attack. Joe, it turns out, didn't consider himself much of a man. The thought of trying to raise a boy terrified him. So he set out on a quest to become more masculine... whatever that means.

    I have no idea how women keep score of who is doing best, but I get the feeling it's complicated and involves shoes and delivering compliments that are actually insults. When men graduate from school, we switch from being judged on athletic ability to being judged on how much money we make.

    Joel earned a Boy Scout merit badge. He spent a weekend with firefighters. He took on home-improvement projects with his ultra-handy father-in-law. He joined the Marines. He fought UFC champ Randy Couture.

    Joel learns that being a man is a lot harder to define than traditionalists would have us believe. Manhood is more a function of character than roles.

    Joel would not let his wife come with him to the firestation. For some reason.
    As Joel's fire chief told him,

    Not to dismiss your entire premise, but none of the activities or skills you plan on doing define becoming a man. A man is honest, kind, and courageous, protects women, is humble, bold, moral, seeks truth, loves children, and fights for what is right.

    If you've ever read a Joel Stein column, you know the sort of wit and self-deprecation you're in for in Man Made. And in that regard, the book certainly doesn't disappoint.

    But it's more than just jokes. Man Made is a trove of manhood-wisdom. Here are five attributes of manhood Joel brought back from his quest. They're not the only five, but they're what really resonated with me:

    1. Nerdiness is a big part of manliness.
    At the end of his boy scout campout, Joel observes

    All I need to do is take my natural nerdiness and apply it to stuff I'm not interested in. The happiest thing I learned this weekend is that nerdiness is a big part of manliness: learning battle dates, perfecting martial arts moves, memorizing NFL passing percentages, knowing a lot of knots even though the only one you really need is the "shoelace knot."

    2. Men control their emotions.
    Controlling your emotions separates children from adults, and all of us from the British... Repression isn't simply civilized; it's the mechanism to express dignity, honor, respect, and self-discipline. It's not that you shouldn't let people know how you feel; it's that you should decide how and when you express it.

    3. Men appreciate and pursue beauty.

    Possibly my favorite section of the book.
    In the midst of his (hilarious) attempts to restore an ancient, dilapidated house with his father-in-law, Joel gains a new appreciation for Ken's manliness:

    I thought Ken was just clueless, taking on projects without thinking them through. But that's not it. Ken knows this house isn't going to make him any money. He knows he's never going to live here. He's doing this because he sees something ugly that he can turn into something beautiful. It is, structurally, a great old house. That's what Ken sees, not value or practicality. He sees beauty everywhere.

    4. Men put others first.
    I thought it was just good leadership, making others feel important. But it's more than that: It's humility. It's not needing to express everything you feel immediately, because you're not the most important person.

    Initially, Joel couldn't wrap his head around the self-sacrificial ethic embodied by the firefighters and marines he befriended. But he came to understand the value of living for something bigger than yourself.

    5. Men contribute, they don't complain.

    Joel learned more than he expected in Boot Camp
    While they were discussing Joel's quest, a marine who lost a day of leave to someone else's mistake observed,

    If you want to be a man, you have to be thankful for what you have.

    This attitude of contentedness, of working hard and getting a job done, not complaining when things don't go your way, feeds into that same self-sacrificial attitude that had baffled Joel. But the more men he surrounded himself with, the more he saw the value of the code - even one that was largely unspoken.

    There are ideals far more valuable than personal success. Our culture might celebrate power, money, and fame, but that's not what they talk about at your funeral. Honorable conduct, even unrecognized, is its own reward.

    Joel, Lazlo and the Lambo
    This drive to contribute, to make the world a better place in your own small way, resonated with Joel. It resonates with me. While so many in our culture pursue the American Dream, personal fulfillment at any cost, Joel learns that some things - like virtue and character - are more important.

    Happiness is overrated. Most of the experiences that have made my life better have been hard and unpleasant.

    What I found fascinating is that none of the qualities of manhood Joel outlines is an explicitly masculine virtue.

    What we really witness in Man Made is a devastating critique of our culture masked by Joel's self-deprecation and wit. He exposes the adolescence of our selfish, self-possessed life. We're tempted to miss the maturity that lies at the heart of much that is traditionally masculine. It's easier to write it all off as old-fashioned.

    But we'd do better to learn with Joel and grow up a bit.

    Bottom Line: Man Made by Joel Stein is a fun, hilarious read that peppers in enough poignant observations on character to be worth your time.
    3 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Ursula F.
    5.0 out of 5 stars A hilarious quest for masculinity!
    Reviewed in Germany on August 4, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    Joel Stein (TIME humor columnist) is a man after my own heart: he is not into sports, does not like camping, hunting or fighting, doesn't fancy getting drunk, likes West Side Story and loves to cook and to talk. Sounds perfect to me! Well, OK, he also doesn't know how to fix anything around the house (and doesn't really want to learn it either, since it's boring to him), which is a downside, since fixing things around the house (including electronic gadgets) is one "manly" activity I extremely appreciate in a man – since I sort of draw the line of emancipation right there...

    When Stein learns that he is having a son, he fears he cannot raise his son adequately, since he has no “manly” qualities and/or interests. Thus, he goes on this “Stupid Quest for Masculinity”, trying out stuff like “Surviving Outdoors” (with a group of Boy Scouts), “Rescuing the Helpless” (with a crew of firefighters) and “Defending my Country” (with the Marines and the Army). Among other things, he also goes (turkey) hunting (without success) and day trading with somebody else's money (with minor success), takes care of a dog for two weeks, and gets in a ring with a UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship) champion. Some of these “manly” activities seem typically American manly activities to me – I don't think anyone in Germany would consider going hunting – or shooting a weapon as such – as defining you as a man. Building a house, yes, fixing things, yes, drinking beer (Bavarian beer, please!), yes, being into sports (here: soccer), probably. Going camping? Not so much... At least that's what I – as a German woman – have observed...

    And I guess German (or European) men would beg to differ here:
    “My parents did insist that I play a sport, so […] I played soccer, the sport for the least tough kids. I always played defense, which is the position in soccer where they put the least tough of the least tough kids.” (p. 64)

    I'm usually not very interested in autobiographical books, but “Man Made” is just hilarious! It's a perfect read for this hot summer – I had to laugh out loud on every single page! Joel Stein's style is easy to read and contains a lot of “neologisms”, such as “manventures” or “barfee” (as opposed to the “barfer” - I am going to use this example – preferably accompanied by illustrating pictures – to make my students remember the difference between “employee” and “employer”). He often makes fun of the people who are trying to teach him some manliness, for example when he is out turkey hunting with Matt and Matt tells him he thinks that the deer (and other animals) have given their presence away to the forest: “I wonder if Matt believes the animals sing joyful Disney songs when we're not here.” (p. 187)

    Has he become manlier at the end of his quest? Find out yourself! One of the funniest books I've read in a very long time!
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  • book addicted
    5.0 out of 5 stars funny as always
    Reviewed in Canada on June 13, 2014
    Verified Purchase
    I just couldn't put it down. He is as funny as always~

    Keep it up Joel~ I am asking my friends all to read it.
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  • Oscar A Mesa
    5.0 out of 5 stars Stein to his best!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 8, 2013
    Verified Purchase
    If you like clever writting and people who can see things from a very different perspective... this is a book for you! If you are member of the GOP... don't waste your time! This is way too clever and very liberal for your mind and taste...
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  • braerae
    5.0 out of 5 stars Man Made: A Stupid Quest for Masculinity
    Reviewed in Canada on November 27, 2012
    Verified Purchase
    This book is refreshing, funny and objective. It is a perfect book for men or women to read. Very light and entertaining.
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