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Tango Lessons: A Memoir Kindle Edition
Tango was an unlikely choice for Meghan Flaherty. A young woman living with the scars of past trauma, she was terrified of being touched and shied away from real passion. But by her late twenties, she knew something had to change. So she dug up an old dream and tried on her dancing shoes.
In tango, there’s a leader and a follower, and, traditionally, the woman follows. As Meghan moved from beginner classes to the late-night dance halls of New York’s vibrant tango underground, she discovered that more than any footwork, the hardest and most essential lesson of the dance was to follow with strength and agency; to find her balance, regardless of the lead. And as she broke her own rule—never mix romance and tango—she started to apply those lessons in every corner of her life. Written in wry, lyrical prose, and beautifully enriched by the vivid history and culture of the dance, Tango Lessons is a transformative story of conquering your fears, living your dreams, and enjoying the dizzying freedom found in the closest embrace.
“Like Sweetbitter, this is a memoir of a young woman trying to make it in contemporary New York City. Like H Is for Hawk and Julie and Julia, it is also portrait of obsession...Flaherty is self-aware and writes beautifully.”—New York Journal of Books
“Flaherty's writing contains moments of real beauty.”—Newsday

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Editorial Reviews
Review
Praise for Tango Lessons Named one of the Most Anticipated Titles of 2018 by The Rumpus An iBooks Most Anticipated Memoir & Biography of the Summer A Rumpus Book Club Selection One of Charleston City Paper's Hot Summer Reads A Thrillist Best Book of the Year So Far One of HelloGiggles's Life-Changing Memoirs of the Summer “As Virginia Woolf wrote, ‘What a lark! What a plunge!’ Meghan Flaherty has written a wonderful book. Encountering tango, she encountered a series of cultures and histories: that of the dance itself; that of its impassioned students, teachers, and acolytes in New York and elsewhere; that of her own very particular desires. Like a first-rate piece of dance, she’s gotten the proportions right: the small details, the sweep of the whole, the use of space, scenery, the group, and the solo players. She is entertaining, thoughtful, and trustworthy because her self-examination—doubts, insecurities, grief—is never self-indulgent. I caught my breath at the end. Bliss indeed, those last sentences. I can’t wait to read what she does next.” —Margo Jefferson, Pulitzer Prize-winning author of Negroland "A dazzlingly honest, unblinking memoir, it is also deliciously written, authentically romantic and enormous fun to read." —Phillip Lopate, author of To Show and to Tell and editor of The Art of the Personal Essay “Meghan Flaherty is simply an astonishing writer. Brimming with sensuous detail and sophisticated wit, every page of Tango Lessons seduces and rebuffs, beguiles and delights. This is easily one of the finest books ever written about dance, and every bit as graceful as the art itself.” —Bronwen Dickey, author of Pit Bull: The Battle over an American Icon "In Meghan Flaherty's Tango Lessons, tango plays a role similar to that of the fancy restaurant in Stephanie Danler's Sweetbitter...Although Sweetbitter is fiction and Tango Lessons is memoir, the books have a similar tone, a dramatic, Sylvia Plath–like lyricism...Flaherty's writing contains moments of real beauty." —Newsday “Not only is this Flaherty’s triumphant account of overcoming her fears after trauma and learning to follow her dreams and trust in herself, but it’s also a beautiful look at the history of tango itself.” —BookRiot "As lyrically written as the steps she practices." —HelloGiggles "[Tango Lessons] takes Flaherty from humdrum New York City dance studios to an intoxicating subculture that had been thrumming, unbeknownst to her, under the surface of her city all along. That’s not all she discovers, of course—while she’s emphatic that tango isn’t the fishnets-and-stilettos dance of cultural stereotype, it is still powerfully intimate, physical, and sensual. Flaherty lyrically captures the essence of the dance, as well as her stumbling journey into self-discovery, with a bit of toe sucking and bad sex along the way." —Thrillist "You know right away, as a dancer does, that you are in good hands. Like Sweetbitter, this is a memoir of a young woman trying to make it in contemporary New York City. Like H Is for Hawk and Julie and Julia, it is also portra —
About the Author
MEGHAN FLAHERTY has an MFA in nonfiction from Columbia University. Her essays and criticism have appeared in the New York Times; O, the Oprah Magazine; the Paris Review; Psychology Today; and elsewhere. She lives in Palo Alto, California, and Tango Lessons is her first book.
Product details
- ASIN : B073XBRVQY
- Publisher : Houghton Mifflin Harcourt (June 19, 2018)
- Publication date : June 19, 2018
- Language : English
- File size : 6.5 MB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Print length : 335 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: #1,831,097 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- #25 in Ballroom Dance (Kindle Store)
- #93 in Ballroom Dance (Books)
- #609 in Dancer Biographies
- Customer Reviews:
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Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonCustomers say
Customers find this memoir delightful to read and well-written, describing it as a coming-of-age story told with heart. Moreover, the book receives positive feedback for its pacing, with one customer noting fascinating glimpses into the art form. However, the tango history aspect receives mixed reactions from customers.
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Customers find the book delightful to read and consider it the best tango book ever.
"...prose is often florid, with some brilliantly clear passages that kept me reading...." Read more
"...A delightful, funny, moving book for dancers and non-dancers alike." Read more
"Fought off sleep and read until dawn to finish this exceptional memoir by Meghan Flaherty, a talented young writer, dancer, and translator...." Read more
"...Tango as a new hobby or because I’m also a writer, but this book was delightful to read...." Read more
Customers find the book heartwarming and engaging, with one customer describing it as a coming-of-age story told with heart.
"...writing is spry and direct-- unflinching when it needs to be, and always lively...." Read more
"...A coming-of-age story told with heart, head and a healthy dose of humor, Tango Lessons seamlessly carries us from the bordellos of early 20th..." Read more
"...scenes, her vivid descriptions of dancing with her partners, and her soulful, reflective moments that seek to make sense of her frenetic life...." Read more
"...It's years in the making. It's a book about the growing pains, finding true meaning of life, and tango history all in one. Best tango book ever...." Read more
Customers praise the writing quality of the book, with one noting its brilliant clarity.
"...The prose is often florid, with some brilliantly clear passages that kept me reading...." Read more
"...The writing is spry and direct-- unflinching when it needs to be, and always lively...." Read more
"...dawn to finish this exceptional memoir by Meghan Flaherty, a talented young writer, dancer, and translator...." Read more
"...Very well written." Read more
Customers appreciate the book's portrayal of dance, with one review highlighting its vivid descriptions of dancing with partners, while another notes how the dance scenes vary in intensity.
"...is life." Like life, the music, the lyrics, and the dance vary in intensity, in intimacy, in creativity, in joy, and in sorrow...." Read more
"...A delightful, funny, moving book for dancers and non-dancers alike." Read more
"...best in her fast-paced relationship scenes, her vivid descriptions of dancing with her partners, and her soulful, reflective moments that seek to..." Read more
"...It gave depth and intrigue to her romantic relationships that otherwise would have gone unnoticed...." Read more
Customers find the book's pacing interesting and innovative, with one customer noting it provides fascinating glimpses into the art form.
"...with the culture of tango, this memoir gives us fascinating glimpses into the art form, from its origins in Argentina and Europe to the contemporary..." Read more
"...she used the world of Tango as almost a character in her story was very clever...." Read more
"Interesting, innovative and engrossing...." Read more
"Enter the world of this smart, sexy memoir!..." Read more
Customers have mixed reactions to the tango history in the book, with some finding it informative and well-integrated, while others find it tedious and difficult to follow.
"...There is a lot of information on the tango in here that I found intriguing, given that I am a tango student myself...." Read more
"I wanted to like this book, but it became increasingly difficult...." Read more
"...The author was very adept at merging the history of Tango into her experiences with learning the dance and all that comes with it...." Read more
"...that it is a metaphor for life but it just became too tedious to really keep my interest." Read more
Top reviews from the United States
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- Reviewed in the United States on June 27, 2018AS someone who loves Argentine tango music and dances to it almost to the point of addiction, I've often heard its appeal as a metaphor for life, as in "Tango is like life" or "El tango es la vida" - "Tango is life." Like life, the music, the lyrics, and the dance vary in intensity, in intimacy, in creativity, in joy, and in sorrow. Depending on your experience and perspective, you can just as easily invert the phrase so that life is like a tango. Meghan Flaherty explores the intricacies of tango - the music and the dance - against the backdrop of a difficult childhood and adolescence whose crippling emotional baggage left her dispirited and passionless, with a string of failed relationships and dead-end jobs. But somewhere along the line, with some luck and a lot of perseverance, along came tango. Spoiler alert - read the book!
- Reviewed in the United States on May 27, 2019My heart goes out to this author and I will be interested in seeing what she writes next. There is a lot of information on the tango in here that I found intriguing, given that I am a tango student myself. But Flaherty had a deeply troubled early childhood for which her stepmother tried very hard to compensate, and the tone of the book flip-flops between self-deprecating humor and it's-all-about-me. The prose is often florid, with some brilliantly clear passages that kept me reading. One reason I finished the book was to see whether I could get some kind of handle on being a student who truly enjoys the tango (even though I am learning slowly and very late in life) who is nevertheless not OBSESSED with tango. I've had the impression from what I've seen of the tango scene in my own city that one is supposed to be obsessed to be valued. Reading the book didn't help me here, but that is certainly not Flaherty's fault.
- Reviewed in the United States on October 22, 2018I savored this book and have gifted it twice! As someone who knew nothing about, nor had much interest in Tango-- I found myself captivated by Flaherty's depiction of a vibrant subculture-- its characters, rules, rhythms, and experiential entry fees. For those who found the memoir dark, I couldn't disagree more. Flaherty demonstrates restraint in all the places where the story could have pooled into wells of self-indulgence. The writing is spry and direct-- unflinching when it needs to be, and always lively. The descriptions of New York were enough to make a former resident long for her lost bodega. I deeply enjoyed wandering the city from within this author's gaze, and think that you will too.
- Reviewed in the United States on June 19, 2018At turns poignant and laugh-out-loud funny, Flaherty's memoir traces her unexpected evolution as a dancer and person. "Twenty five years old and flailing," Flaherty attempts to escape the rut (soulless office job, dead-end relationship) by returning to a youthful dream of learning tango -- and boy are we lucky she did. A coming-of-age story told with heart, head and a healthy dose of humor, Tango Lessons seamlessly carries us from the bordellos of early 20th century Buenos Aires to the underground New York tango scene (neither the "covert sex club" her mother imagines nor quite as innocent as young Flaherty first believes). A delightful, funny, moving book for dancers and non-dancers alike.
- Reviewed in the United States on September 5, 2018Fought off sleep and read until dawn to finish this exceptional memoir by Meghan Flaherty, a talented young writer, dancer, and translator. As the author explores the mysteries of tango and her passion for dance, she finds the courage to delve into her abuse-filled childhood and her fear of love and intimacy.
The coming-of-age journey is a familiar one. But for readers who are unfamiliar with the culture of tango, this memoir gives us fascinating glimpses into the art form, from its origins in Argentina and Europe to the contemporary dance scene in New York and other big cities. At the same time, we follow the big city dreams of Flaherty, a struggling actress who finds escape and solace in dark and dingy dance halls, often staggering home at dawn.
Readers young and old who have pursued elusive dreams in any field will see themselves in Flaherty as she stumbles, rises, falls again. Flaherty is at her best in her fast-paced relationship scenes, her vivid descriptions of dancing with her partners, and her soulful, reflective moments that seek to make sense of her frenetic life. The memoir slows a bit when she delves into a seemingly encyclopedic history of tango; sharing the teachings of the great tango legends would have been more effective if she had been more selective.
But that's a minor point. For the most part, this is a powerful book by a writer who is wise beyond her years. I highly recommend it.
- Reviewed in the United States on March 8, 2021I wanted to like this book, but it became increasingly difficult. Just as the author was about to commit to some real growth about herself, then she ducked back into an 5-6 page mini-lecture on some aspect of the dance. I'd have to judge that more than 50% of the book is didactic about the tango. It is much less a memoir and much more a non-fiction, long-form essay about a specific dance and how it is done in New York.