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The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes Kindle Edition
Knowing how to formulate and ask incisive questions to get to the core of a conflict, challenge entrenched thinking, and shift perspectives is the key to successful conflict resolution. The Mediator’s Toolkit employs the author’s powerful “S Questions Model” to provide readers with the skills and tools to do just that. It addresses four dimensions of successful questions for mediation: the subject matter dimension, the structure dimension, the information-seeking dimension, and the shifting thinking dimension. The toolkit clearly explains:
- The theory behind each question type, including exploration of relevant neuroscience and psychology
- The purpose of different types of questions
- How the questions work
- When to use different types of questions
- How to build and apply questions to mediation in a non-threatening way
This essential practical guide will radically sharpen, focus, and improve the questioning skills of qualified mediators, students, lecturers, trainers, and those using questions to challenge and effect change, in any context.
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherNew Society Publishers
- Publication dateSeptember 18, 2018
- File size10860 KB
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From the Publisher
Editorial Reviews
Review
"All the most important conflicts we face today, from war and politics to workplace and domestic disputes, are sparked by the brain's responses to conflict. In the last few years, groundbreaking neurophysiological research has led to profound new understandings of how the brain works, and to immensely creative, powerful new ways of responding to conflict. Gerry O'Sullivan has written a wonderful, well-researched, fascinating and practical toolkit for mediators that offers fresh new insights into how we can help our brains discover the questions that can transform conflicts into opportunities for resolution, learning and improved relationships. It is a terrific read, and one you will relish and be grateful for."
— Kenneth Cloke, mediator and author of The Dance of Opposites: Explorations in Mediation, Dialogue and Conflict Resolution Systems Design.
"An invaluable analysis, not merely of questions, but of a range of process interventions, to equip mediators in all sectors to deepen the effectiveness of their work with people in dispute. Mediators have to work in the moment, exercising their intuition in a flash as to what to do next and how. This book will help to develop the internal base from which such intuitive insights emerge."
— Tony Allen, Mediator and Senior Consultant to CEDR, London
"As a mediator and trainer this is a must have book. It fills a gap in the literature that has long been ignored but goes to the heart of mediating conflicts. The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes strikes the right balance between theory and practice making sure mediators know what to ask; why these questions are important; and the theoretical foundations of the cognitive shift the questions seek to initiate. O'Sullivan's examples and cases are reflective of a mediator's reality making the toolkit a valuable book to buy in hardcover and keep on the desk."
— Dr. Juan Diaz-Prinz, Mediator and Trainer in Conflict Management, Berlin, Germany
"The Mediator's Toolkit stands out among all teaching, self-help and learning books for mediators (professionals and wanna-bes), and their trainers, because it touches the part of mediator's art which most professionals only reach through sweat and blood during many mediations: the art of knowing how, when and why to ask the timely felicitous questions. This is revealed masterfully in the 'S Questions Model' developed by O'Sullivan. This book will immediately go to the must-have/reading lists and will become one of my everyday reference books. The content is so well organised, it is an easy-to-use source of information and an inspiration for creative mediation work."
— Irena Vanenkova, international mediator, Moscow, Russia; director, Singapore International Mediation Institute; former executive director, International Mediation Institute
"Questions are the steering wheel for navigating difficult conversations, and at long last mediators have a valuable guide in the Mediator's Toolkit. The book dives deep into the psychology of information and emotion in conflict situations, illustrating in nuanced detail how well crafted questions can lead conflicting parties to a wider understanding and therefore better outcomes. Highly recommended for facilitators and negotiators as well as mediators."
— Jennifer Beer, author, The Mediator's Handbook; Negotiation instructor, Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania
"Thoroughly enjoyable read as well as an invaluable resource for mediators in training and experienced mediators, which will become an immediate "classic". The accessible writing, illustrations, case studies, and questions make it a must-read on our programme Reading Lists. I look forward to continuing to dip in and out of the book in my own preparation for and reflection on my mediation practice."
— Treasa Kenny, Academic Programme Coordinator and Lecturer, Edward M. Kennedy Institute for Conflict Intervention, Maynooth University, Ireland
"The Mediator's Toolkit is a rare thing indeed — a practical manual built on a solid foundation of knowledge and theory. Set out in an engaging, user friendly format, this book fills a crucial gap in mediation skills and practice — knowing WHY and HOW different questions work at various junctures in mediation, instead of just providing a list of interventions. Drawing on cutting edge research in psychology and neuroscience, this book gives both novice and experienced mediators new insight into their practice, and a concrete and easy to use model for improving this practice and developing their skills to a very high level. This book is essential reading for all students of conflict and mediation, and should have a place in the briefcase of every practising mediator, no matter how experienced."
— Sabine Walsh, President, Mediators' Institute of Ireland, Course Director, MA Conflict Management, St. Angela's College Sligo
"Questioning is often an unknown territory that O'Sullivan unravels. The Mediator's Toolkit is a most welcome, useful, and sophisticated addition to the mediation and conflict coaching field. It synthesizes and explains the tools that are most relevant to questions in a user friendly, while intelligent fashion, with a view to practice. It will be a reference book for the serious hands-on professional for years to come."
— Dr. Antje Herrberg, CEO, Mediateur; Adjunct Professor in Peace Mediation, College of Europe; Former Member of the UN Standby Team for Mediation
"During my 24 years of mediating, I have always felt there has been insufficient attention given to the role of effective use of questions as part of the mediator's toolkit. Indeed in my experience most mediator training and texts only pay cursory attention to this skill-set. The Mediator's Toolkit skillfully and clearly fills this gap. It provides mediators with a clear conceptual framework to structure their questioning, clearly sets out the theoretical and psychological underpinnings to these techniques and then in some detail gives practical examples of how these questions may be used in mediation. While clearly written with mediators in mind, it is an invaluable resources to all those looking to resolve conflict."
— James South, Mediator and Managing Director, The Centre for Effective Dispute Resolution (CEDR), London
Review
"All the most important conflicts we face today, from war and politics to workplace and domestic disputes, are sparked by the brain's responses to conflict. In the last few years, groundbreaking neurophysiological research has led to profound new understandings of how the brain works, and to immensely creative, powerful new ways of responding to conflict. Gerry O'Sullivan has written a wonderful, well-researched, fascinating and practical toolkit for mediators that offers fresh new insights into how we can help our brains discover the questions that can transform conflicts into opportunities for resolution, learning and improved relationships. It is a terrific read, and one you will relish and be grateful for."
― Kenneth Cloke, mediator and author of The Dance of Opposites: Explorations in Mediation, Dialogue and Conflict Resolution Systems Design.
"An invaluable analysis, not merely of questions, but of a range of process interventions, to equip mediators in all sectors to deepen the effectiveness of their work with people in dispute. Mediators have to work in the moment, exercising their intuition in a flash as to what to do next and how. This book will help to develop the internal base from which such intuitive insights emerge."
― Tony Allen, Mediator and Senior Consultant to CEDR, London
"As a mediator and trainer this is a must have book. It fills a gap in the literature that has long been ignored but goes to the heart of mediating conflicts. The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes strikes the right balance between theory and practice making sure mediators know what to ask; why these questions are important; and the theoretical foundations of the cognitive shift the questions seek to initiate. O'Sullivan's examples and cases are reflective of a mediator's reality making the toolkit a valuable book to buy in hardcover and keep on the desk."
― Dr. Juan Diaz-Prinz, Mediator and Trainer in Conflict Management, Berlin, Germany
"The Mediator's Toolkit stands out among all teaching, self-help and learning books for mediators (professionals and wanna-bes), and their trainers, because it touches the part of mediator's art which most professionals only reach through sweat and blood during many mediations: the art of knowing how, when and why to ask the timely felicitous questions. This is revealed masterfully in the 'S Questions Model' developed by O'Sullivan. This book will immediately go to the must-have/reading lists and will become one of my everyday reference books. The content is so well organised, it is an easy-to-use source of information and an inspiration for creative mediation work."
― Irena Vanenkova, international mediator, Moscow, Russia; director, Singapore International Mediation Institute; former executive director, International Mediation Institute
"Questions are the steering wheel for navigating difficult conversations, and at long last mediators have a valuable guide in the Mediator's Toolkit. The book dives deep into the psychology of information and emotion in conflict situations, illustrating in nuanced detail how well crafted questions can lead conflicting parties to a wider understanding and therefore better outcomes. Highly recommended for facilitators and negotiators as well as mediators."
― Jennifer Beer, author, The Mediator's Handbook; Negotiation instructor, Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania
"Thoroughly enjoyable read as well as an invaluable resource for mediators in training and experienced mediators, which will become an immediate "classic". The accessible writing, illustrations, case studies, and questions make it a must-read on our programme Reading Lists. I look forward to continuing to dip in and out of the book in my own preparation for and reflection on my mediation practice."
― Treasa Kenny, Academic Programme Coordinator and Lecturer, Edward M. Kennedy Institute for Conflict Intervention, Maynooth University, Ireland
"The Mediator's Toolkit is a rare thing indeed ― a practical manual built on a solid foundation of knowledge and theory. Set out in an engaging, user friendly format, this book fills a crucial gap in mediation skills and practice ― knowing WHY and HOW different questions work at various junctures in mediation, instead of just providing a list of interventions. Drawing on cutting edge research in psychology and neuroscience, this book gives both novice and experienced mediators new insight into their practice, and a concrete and easy to use model for improving this practice and developing their skills to a very high level. This book is essential reading for all students of conflict and mediation, and should have a place in the briefcase of every practising mediator, no matter how experienced."
― Sabine Walsh, President, Mediators' Institute of Ireland, Course Director, MA Conflict Management, St. Angela's College Sligo
"Questioning is often an unknown territory that O'Sullivan unravels. The Mediator's Toolkit is a most welcome, useful, and sophisticated addition to the mediation and conflict coaching field. It synthesizes and explains the tools that are most relevant to questions in a user friendly, while intelligent fashion, with a view to practice. It will be a reference book for the serious hands-on professional for years to come."
― Dr. Antje Herrberg, CEO, Mediateur; Adjunct Professor in Peace Mediation, College of Europe; Former Member of the UN Standby Team for Mediation
"During my 24 years of mediating, I have always felt there has been insufficient attention given to the role of effective use of questions as part of the mediator's toolkit. Indeed in my experience most mediator training and texts only pay cursory attention to this skill-set. The Mediator's Toolkit skillfully and clearly fills this gap. It provides mediators with a clear conceptual framework to structure their questioning, clearly sets out the theoretical and psychological underpinnings to these techniques and then in some detail gives practical examples of how these questions may be used in mediation. While clearly written with mediators in mind, it is an invaluable resources to all those looking to resolve conflict."
― James South, Mediator and Managing Director, The Centre for Effective Dispute Resolution (CEDR), London
From the Inside Flap
Learn how to formulate and ask penetrating, paradigm-shifting questions for successful outcomes in any conflict
An invaluable analysis, not merely of questions, but of a range of process interventions, to equip mediators in all sectors to deepen the effectiveness of their work.
Tony Allen, mediator and senior consultant, CEDR, London
A must-have book. It strikes the right balance between theory and practice making sure mediators know what to ask and why these questions are important.
Dr. Juan Diaz-Prinz, Mediator and Trainer in Conflict Management, Berlin, Germany
KNOWING HOW to formulate and ask incisive questions to get to the core of a conflict, challenge entrenched thinking, and shift perspectives are the main challenge for mediators and the key to successful conflict resolution.
The Mediator's Toolkit employs the author's powerful "S Questions Model," to provide readers with the skills and tools to develop and ask strategic questions that will shift the thinking and approaches of parties in conflict. The S Questions Model toolkit dives into four dimensions of successful questions for mediation: the subject matter dimension, the structure dimension, the information seeking dimension, and the shifting thinking dimension. The toolkit clearly explains:
- The theory behind each question type, including exploration of relevant neuroscience and psychology
- The purpose of different types of questions
- How the questions work
- When to use different types of questions
- How to build and apply questions to mediation in a non-threatening way.
This essential practical guide will radically sharpen, focus, and improve the questioning skills of qualified mediators, students, lecturers, trainers, and those using questions to challenge and effect change, in any context.
Questions are the steering wheel for navigating difficult conversations, and at long last mediators have a valuable guide in the Mediator's Toolkit. Highly recommended.
Jennifer Beer, co-author, The Mediator's Handbook
Stands out among all books for mediators and trainers.
Irena Vanenkova , former executive director, International Mediation Institute
GERRY O'SULLIVAN is a mediator, trainer, and facilitator with over 30 years' experience in conflict resolution and training. She is an advanced member of the Mediators' Institute of Ireland (MII), a member of the US-based Mediators Beyond Borders Consultants Team, and has delivered training with Lawyers Without Borders. Gerry is Director of O'Sullivan Solutions, and lives on the southwest coast of Ireland.
From the Back Cover
Learn how to formulate and ask penetrating, paradigm-shifting questions for successful outcomes in any conflict
"An invaluable analysis, not merely of questions, but of a range of process interventions, to equip mediators in all sectors to deepen the effectiveness of their work."
― Tony Allen, mediator and senior consultant, CEDR, London
"A must-have book. It strikes the right balance between theory and practice making sure mediators know what to ask and why these questions are important. "
― Dr. Juan Diaz-Prinz, Mediator and Trainer in Conflict Management, Berlin, Germany
KNOWING HOW to formulate and ask incisive questions to get to the core of a conflict, challenge entrenched thinking, and shift perspectives are the main challenge for mediators and the key to successful conflict resolution.
The Mediator's Toolkit employs the author's powerful "S Questions Model," to provide readers with the skills and tools to develop and ask strategic questions that will shift the thinking and approaches of parties in conflict. The S Questions Model toolkit dives into four dimensions of successful questions for mediation: the subject matter dimension, the structure dimension, the information seeking dimension, and the shifting thinking dimension. The toolkit clearly explains:
- The theory behind each question type, including exploration of relevant neuroscience and psychology
- The purpose of different types of questions
- How the questions work
- When to use different types of questions
- How to build and apply questions to mediation in a non-threatening way.
This essential practical guide will radically sharpen, focus, and improve the questioning skills of qualified mediators, students, lecturers, trainers, and those using questions to challenge and effect change, in any context.
"Questions are the steering wheel for navigating difficult conversations, and at long last mediators have a valuable guide in the Mediator's Toolkit. Highly recommended."
― Jennifer Beer, co-author, The Mediator's Handbook
"Stands out among all books for mediators and trainers."
― Irena Vanenkova , former executive director, International Mediation Institute
GERRY O'SULLIVAN is a mediator, trainer, and facilitator with over 30 years' experience in conflict resolution and training. She is an advanced member of the Mediators' Institute of Ireland (MII), a member of the US-based Mediators Beyond Borders Consultants Team, and has delivered training with Lawyers Without Borders. Gerry is Director of O'Sullivan Solutions, and lives on the southwest coast of Ireland.
About the Author
Gerry O'Sullivan is a mediator, trainer and facilitator with over 30 years' experience in conflict resolution and training. She's a practitioner-member of the Mediators' Institute of Ireland (MII), a member of the US-based Mediators Beyond Borders Consultants Team, and has delivered training with Lawyers Without Borders. Gerry is Director of O'Sullivan Solutions and she lives on the southwest coast of Ireland.
Product details
- ASIN : B07F5C4FZ1
- Publisher : New Society Publishers (September 18, 2018)
- Publication date : September 18, 2018
- Language : English
- File size : 10860 KB
- Text-to-Speech : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Enhanced typesetting : Enabled
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Word Wise : Enabled
- Sticky notes : On Kindle Scribe
- Print length : 259 pages
- Best Sellers Rank: #258,133 in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
- Customer Reviews:
About the author
‘The Mediator’s Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes’
Website: https://www.osullivansolutions.ie
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerryosullivanmediationtraining/
Book endorsements:
http://www.osullivansolutions.ie/shtml/mediators_toolkit.shtml
Kenneth Cloke, Mediator and Author, California:
"Gerry O’Sullivan has written a wonderful, well-researched, fascinating and practical toolkit for mediators that offers fresh new insights into how we can help our brains discover the questions that can transform conflicts into opportunities for resolution, learning and improved relationships. It is a terrific read, and one you will relish and be grateful for.”
Video description of the book:
https://www.osullivansolutions.ie/who-i-am/my-book/
or
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=The+Mediator%27s+Toolkit+
ONLINE TRAINING BASED ON THE BOOK
Online mediation training on 'The S Questions Model' as developed in the book 'The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes'
https://www.osullivansolutions.ie/mediation-questions-training/
This interesting and exciting online mediation training will bring you to being an advanced level mediator with a skillset of mediation questions to bring parties to settlement.
Feedback from Kathleen Young, M. Ed., North Shore, Massachusetts, U.S.A.
‘The ‘S Questions Model’ is one of the most meaningful and useful trainings I've experienced - a truly transformative model of questioning. Gerry teaches the art of asking questions on a whole new level. I will never mediate or coach in the same way again.’
Video description of the online training - live through zoom and self-paced learning:
https://youtu.be/4NnBxeYB0Gk
or
https://www.osullivansolutions.ie/mediation-questions-training/
OTHER COMMENTS FROM THE ONLINE TRAINING:
Ireland
‘I completed the fantastic online course on ‘The S Questions Model Training’. The engaging course material – expertly delivered - gave me new insights into the skill of question formulation for mediation. Gerry is making an enormous contribution to the Mediation profession, thank you for a truly excellent course.’
Teresa Blake, Senior Counsel (Member of the Inner Bar) & Accredited Mediator
South Africa
‘Gerry is a question wizard. She knows exactly what type of question to ask to unlock a situation. Her poise, calm manner and extensive experience with which she asks even incisive and uncomfortable questions are exemplary. I enjoyed the online training and her sharing of knowledge and skills tremendously.’
Naett Atkinson, Co-Founder at Let’s Resolve
Moldova
‘This online course is really insightful. It provides the opportunity not only to deepen the theoretical knowledge of the mediation process in a structured way, but also to practice some techniques with your peers‘
Natalia Djandigava, Project Manager at Crisis Management Initiative (CMI), Moldova
Ireland
‘I found the content and delivery to be exceptional and I can honestly say that I have learned more from this incredible training than any other course I have completed. I attended the live four half-days online training.’
Sharon McGarr, BA (Hons) Psychology, MA Mediation and Conflict Intervention, Fieldwork Coordinator on the PRIMERA Project
Scotland
‘I’ve just finished a brilliant online training course delivered by the wonderfully knowledgeable and published author, Gerry O'Sullivan. I highly recommend Gerry’s course - and her book!’
Rachael Bicknell, Founder Squaring Circles, Mediator & Solicitor, Edinburgh, Scotland
WHO AM I?
The first thing I need to say is that I love training mediators, passionately.
And the second thing I need to say is that I have become an author by default!
While training mediators for the Mediators' Institute of Ireland, I noted that when learners became 'stuck' when playing the part of a mediator in a mediation role play, they were always searching for the next question, the question that would help to create a paradigm shift in the thinking and approach of parties in conflict, and fix everything! So, I started to search for a helpful book but I could not find one dedicated to this topic.
It looked like I needed to develop my own model if I was to serve my learners adequately and so I started a fascinating five-year journey of research and writing to produce 'The S Questions Model' as introduced in the 'The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes'.
This book delves into the theory behind each of the mediation question types, including exploration of relevant neuroscience and psychology, the purpose of different types of question, how the question works, when to use it and how to build and apply the questions to mediation in a non-threatening way.
I started to use the one-page graphic of this model-in-development as a reference tool during my own mediation practice, as well as for my training programmes. This really helped me to expand and refine the model for production in 'The Mediator's Toolkit: Formulating and Asking Questions for Successful Outcomes'. But the development of the 'S Questions Model' is a continuing journey and I look forward to having feedback from readers and learners so it can be further refined.
The last thing you need to know is that I live in a most beautiful part of the world called Maharees, on the Dingle peninsula in Ireland, but I am willing to leave it and travel anywhere in the world to deliver training programmes on ‘The S Questions Model’. I have developed a training package, that includes film footage of mediation role plays, on how to use this questions model in mediation.
ENDORSEMENTS
Book endorsements:
http://www.osullivansolutions.ie/shtml/mediators_toolkit.shtml
CONTACT
https://www.osullivansolutions.ie
If you have any questions, please contact me on osullivansolutions1@gmail.com or WhatsApp text at 00353879887771.
Thank you,
Gerry
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My experience with the Kindle version of this book is certainly positive, but there is some distortion of the many useful figures/charts that the author, Gerry O'Sullivan has given us as learning tools. If you are a fan of Kindle readers like me, I strongly suggest that you purchase that version along with the paperback. Otherwise, I wouldn't be without the printed version which is well laid out, logical and easy to read. I would give this book 5 stars all the way. The combination of Gerry O'Sullivan's writing, research and teaching skills and the New Society Publishers crisp/clean publishing skills certainly makes for a 'home-run'!
I can tell Ms. O'Sullivan is an expert with years of experience, based on how directly she teaches. Other mediation authors I've read waste too much time talking about their own backgrounds and only vaguely advises on what to do. The bulk of The Mediator's Toolkit provides extensive definitions, methodologies, and examples of 4 categories of questions: The subject matter, structure, seeking information, and shift thinking. She provides useful information about the way we processed information and how the brain works and responds.
I'm so impressed by this book, that I plan to take Ms. O'Sullivan's online class!
Kathleen Young, Young Mediation Associates
Reviewed in the United States on February 8, 2022
Kathleen Young, Young Mediation Associates