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Don't Tell Me What to Do, Just Send Money: The Essential Parenting Guide to the College Years Paperback – July 5, 2011

4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 46 ratings
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This completely revised and updated edition of Don't Tell Me What To Do, Just Send Money prepares parents for the issues that they will encounter during their children's college years. Since our original publication over ten years ago, there has been a dramatic increase in the use of cell phone and internet technology. The birth of the term ‘helicopter parent' is, in part, due to the instant and frequent connectivity that parents have with their children today. Parents are struggling with the appropriate use of communicative technology and aren't aware of its impact on their child's development, both personally and academically.

With straightforward practicality and using humorous and helpful case examples and dialogues, Don't Tell Me What To Do, Just Send Money helps parents lay the groundwork for a new kind of relationship so that they can help their child more effectively handle everything they'll encounter during their college years.

Previous page
  1. Print length
    384 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publication date
    July 5, 2011
  4. Dimensions
    7.45 x 1.15 x 9 inches
  5. ISBN-10
    0312573642
  6. ISBN-13
    978-0312573645
  7. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

“College consultant Johnson and educator Schelhas-Miller (Human Development/Cornell Univ.)...provide easily applicable tips on how to achieve the fine balance between their child's continued dependence and burgeoning adulthood. Concise in their points, the authors tackle everything from declaring a major to frat parties to campus security. With insight on how to allow a child to develop their own identity and make their own decisions and whether or not to Facebook-friend college-aged children, the authors urge against the tendency toward "helicopter parenting," or hovering. This is particularly difficult in the age of the "Electronic Umbilical Cord," to which the authors pay particular heed in their discussion of making the most of technology without overstepping boundaries. Most beneficial for parents, whether their child is college-aged or not, is the chapter entitled "When to Worry, When to Act," in which parents are instructed on how to deal with problems and crises, and how to tell the difference. A valuable guide for every parent.” ―Kirkus Reviews

About the Author

Helen Johnson founded and directed Cornell University's first Parents' Program. She has worked for more than twenty-five years in higher education as a writer, career center director, assistant dean of students, and program manager. She is the parent of two recent college graduates and lives in Chapel Hill, North Carolina.



Christine Schelhas-Miller teaches adolescent development in the department of human development at Cornell University and is a consultant to independent, secondary schools on issues related to adolescent development. For over twenty years she has worked in higher education, providing academic, personal, and career counseling to students. She is the parent of two children and lives in Ithaca, New York.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Golden Guides from St. Martin's Press; Second Edition, Revised (July 5, 2011)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 384 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0312573642
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0312573645
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.55 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 7.45 x 1.15 x 9 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 46 ratings

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Helen E. Johnson

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Customer reviews

4.3 out of 5 stars
4.3 out of 5
46 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

LM
5.0 out of 5 stars A Must Read if you have a child going to college for the first time!
Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2015
Verified Purchase
this book was recommended to parents at my son's Freshman Orientation session for parents only last summer. It was "highly" recommended by the Dean of Students at the university, and it was one of the best pieces of advice she gave us that day. I ordered it right after we returned from Orientation and it is great, full of practical ideas, suggestions and recommendations. It is not a book you read through in a couple of sittings by any means - at least for me. I read, reflect and absorb a couple of chapters at a time - at random. My son is commuting to school daily (his choice) but the book has been an extremely helpful guide to my husband and me, as we help our son A(and only child) continue to "navigate" in his freshman year. It helps us, help him. The authors use a lot of humor and again, the advice is very practical and down to earth Really glad I purchased this.
3 people found this helpful
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MGS
5.0 out of 5 stars An easy to read guide for parents facing the challenges of ...
Reviewed in the United States on April 24, 2017
Verified Purchase
An easy to read guide for parents facing the challenges of college age children. Many of my questions were answered and the approach the author suggested makes sense.
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Mary Patton
3.0 out of 5 stars Ok
Reviewed in the United States on November 16, 2018
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Ok
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kummle
5.0 out of 5 stars Very informative and fun to read
Reviewed in the United States on October 12, 2010
Verified Purchase
I had the opportunity to meet the author at a college function, so had an idea what I was buying - and yes, I love the book! It is full of excellent information and ideas about how to ease the "angst" when your child leaves for college.
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Socrates
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent
Reviewed in the United States on March 15, 2013
Verified Purchase
Right to the point with many issues ready to read and apply! Ideal for the parent who does not want to read the whole book in order to realize what to do!
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kathleen stlawrence
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book!
Reviewed in the United States on November 29, 2013
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This book gives excellent information on what you and your child are going through. It also gives very helpful advice on what to do and what not to do.
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Anne Clausen
5.0 out of 5 stars Great read for College students parents
Reviewed in the United States on October 27, 2012
Verified Purchase
I highly recommend this for parents in the letting their child become an adult stage of life!! Invaluable. Take it home with you
One person found this helpful
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Eager Reader
2.0 out of 5 stars Give In and Send Money
Reviewed in the United States on October 25, 2011
Verified Purchase
The premise of this book seems to be: Your child is a legal adult, so don't tell him/her what to do, just send money. Yes, that's right, I felt that the book seemed to advise doing exactly as the son or daughter would prefer. I had hoped for a guide to ensuring that certain standards are met, in order to justify the flow of money. You know, like decent grades, reasonable plans for finishing on time, no wasting money on luxury purchases while Mom and Dad are sacrificing to pay tuition, etc. Instead, what I found was a guide to feeling OK about giving up those expectations. Not so useful.
23 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Amazon Customer
1.0 out of 5 stars pretty light and
Reviewed in Canada on October 17, 2015
Verified Purchase
Hoped the information would be more dense...pretty light and superficial
One person found this helpful
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