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Before I Forget: Love, Hope, Help, and Acceptance in Our Fight Against Alzheimer's Kindle Edition

by B. Smith (Author), Dan Gasby (Author), Michael Shnayerson (Author), Format: Kindle Edition
4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 1,384 ratings
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“A powerful portrait of Alzheimer’s…marked by strong emotions and often bleak honesty.”
—The Washington Post

“The vulnerability, courage, and honesty in Before I Forget are heart-opening. Fear can be paralyzing…yet B. and Dan beautifully demonstrate that there is a different way to approach this stealthy invader. Alzheimer’s needs to come out of the shadows, and this book is an important step.” 
—Maria Shriver

Restaurateur, magazine publisher, celebrity chef, and nationally known lifestyle maven, B. Smith is struggling at 66 with a tag she never expected to add to that string: Alzheimer's patient. She’s not alone. Every 67 seconds someone newly develops it, and millions of lives are affected by its aftershocks.
 
B. and her husband, Dan, working with Vanity Fair contributing editor Michael Shnayerson, unstintingly share their unfolding story. Crafted in short chapters that interweave their narrative with practical and helpful advice, readers learn about dealing with Alzheimer's day-to-day challenges: the family realities and tensions, ways of coping, coming research that may tip the scale, as well as lessons learned along the way.
 
At its heart, Before I Forget is a love story: illuminating a love of family, life, and hope.

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  1. Print length
    302 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Sticky notes
    On Kindle Scribe
  4. Publisher
    Harmony
  5. Publication date
    January 19, 2016
  6. File size
    2417 KB
  7. Page Flip
    Enabled
  8. Word Wise
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"...An enduring love story."
—Publishers Weekly starred review

"A brave and important story, told with candor, love and useful information. Before I Forget offers a real glimpse into what Alzheimer’s actually looks like in a loved one, and sheds a hopeful light on why this disease needs much more research, funding, and attention."
—Kimberly Williams-Paisley, actor and author of Where the Light Gets In

"What an amazing couple and what an amazing book! It is medically and scientifically accurate, and yet places this devastating disease in the context of a beautiful and intimate relationship. We must do better as a community, in our families and within our government in responding to this disease. African-Americans are especially called upon to get more involved in the research as this disease disproportionately impacts us."
—Dr. David Satcher, Former Surgeon General of the United States
 
“B. and her husband Dan made it to the top by breaking through societal barriers. Now they are facing down her heart- breaking diagnosis and fighting to live each day with love and dignity. Read Before I Forget to understand how Alzheimer’s tests both patient and family. Admire their courage, honesty, and how they use their celebrity to advocate for research and prevention.”
—Meryl Comer, president of the Geoffrey Beene Foundation Alzheimer's Initiative and author of Slow Dancing With A Stranger: Lost and Found in the Age of Alzheimer's

"Before I Forget, Dan Gasby's valentine to his wife, B. Smith, courageously lifts the veil that shields those with Alzheimer's. It is moving testimony to the power of love and the true meaning of what "in sickness and health" really means. Before I Forget is, quite simply, unforgettable."
—George and Trish Vradenburg, Co-Founders, USAgainstAlzheimer's

About the Author

B. Smith was a true American success story. Born in rural western Pennsylvania and faced with what would be, for most, insurmountable obstacles, Barbara “B.” Smith was one of the first supermodels. She wrote three highly acclaimed cookbooks, and over a 28-year period founded three successful restaurants, while also launching a nationally syndicated television show and a magazine. She was the first African-American woman with home products distributed exclusively at Bed Bath & Beyond. She was also a recipient of numerous national and local awards for helping those in need. B. Smith passed away in 2020, at age 70, from early-onset Alzheimer’s.

Dan Gasby has been a television media sales executive and a television producer for both network & syndicated programs. He helped publish and launch B.'s eponymous magazine and helped cofound her lifestyle retail brand.

Michael Shnayerson is a long-time contributing editor to Vanity Fair. He is also the author or co-author of six books, among them entertainer and civil rights activist Harry Belafonte's My Song: A Memoir of Art, Race and Defiance. He has also published an unauthorized biography of New York governor Andrew Cuomo, The Contender.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B00WPQHIMA
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Harmony (January 19, 2016)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ January 19, 2016
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 2417 KB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 302 pages
  • Page numbers source ISBN ‏ : ‎ 0553447122
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 1,384 ratings

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Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
4.6 out of 5
1,384 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

Roz
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book on dealing with dementia
Reviewed in the United States on March 11, 2024
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Dealing with a love one who has dementia, this book gives some insight on caring for your loved one.
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Ann
5.0 out of 5 stars Beautiful love story
Reviewed in the United States on February 7, 2016
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Dan Gasby shares his journey with wife, B. Smith, from the first time they met almost 30 years ago, to the moment he knew he had fallen in love with her, their fairytale marriage, and how younger onset Alzheimer's came knocking at their door to change life forever. The book also includes a sprinkling of short chapters written by B., to help us understand the disease from her perspective.

Every page is honest, bold, and compelling, and anyone who has been touched by Alzheimer's will no doubt find many parallels to their own story. So many of the thoughts and emotions Gasby speaks of were reminiscent of those I felt with my own mother during her illness. I found those passages particularly validating.

Gasby gives readers an inside look at his life with B., sharing common challenges such as taking away car keys, coping with changes in personality, and bringing in outside assistance. Along the way, he offers tips and shares valuable lessons learned. He also explores the world of science, critical need for more study participants, and reasons African Americans are at a higher risk for the disease yet historically have a lower participation rate in research studies and clinical trials.

The book is many things: a memoir, a caregiving guide, an Alzheimer's research primer, and a passionate advocate's call to action. Most of all, though, it's a beautiful love story.
20 people found this helpful
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lbh
4.0 out of 5 stars Engrossing
Reviewed in the United States on June 24, 2023
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I loved the up front honesty and the very candid way in which this was written.
I learned an abundance of information that I can use for myself as well as a lot that will be useful for my loved ones with Alzheimer's.
I appreciate the frankness in which the book was written. It was as if I were taking this journey with you. Thank you for your heartfelt book and, your opening of your personal life to me.
It was a page turner. I couldn't put it down. Even knowing what the ending would bring.
Thank You
Liane
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Betsy Fanning
5.0 out of 5 stars Slap in the face good!
Reviewed in the United States on March 28, 2024
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As hard as it was to read and relive what is like to care for a loved one with Alzheimer's, this book touched my heart and awakened an activist spirit. I've joined the registry and hope to help others in the trenches. A horrible disease that needs to be eradicated in our lifetime!
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Samantha Bourne
5.0 out of 5 stars "Remember, there is still a living spirit inside this diminished person, the spirit of someone you love," (Gasby & Smith, p.274)
Reviewed in the United States on May 3, 2018
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I purchased this novel during the winter of 2017. I am in school and took my time reading this book. Great facts were shared for those dealing with this disease and how it is a disease that affects millions of people worldwide. I appreciated the information shared especially for African Americans. The historical data on Henrietta Lacks was priceless. Her unrequested contribution to the medical field is a huge debt to medical science. Who can bring up diseases that impact people worldwide like Alzheimer's and not pay homage to Henrietta Lacks? As described in the book, her unusual cell replication was put to use in cancer research, gene mapping, in vitro fertilization, and Alzheimer's, (Gasby & Smith, 2016, p. 254-255). I'm glad that the back story of Henrietta was shared in that the cells were used without consent from her or her family. I do not blame African Americans for not getting more involved in the research trials and studies of Alzheimer's. Between this information and Tuskegee, there is a huge debt that needs to be acknowledged and paid. Another part of this story is the exploration of true companionship. Companionship was truly expressed in Chapter Thirteen, Everson, Pennsylvania when Dan narrated Barbara's childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood years. I was so impressed with the information he knew of Barbara's life before he was even in the picture! Many reasons were given for the cause of African Americans being twice as likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer's. The stress of poverty, intensified by racism, may assist with onset Alzheimer's. Diet was brought up as many African American who have been diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes have comorbidity to Alzheimer's as well. Lastly, environmental factors may also play a role in as many African Americans, particularly, in the rural South, work around toxins from dense metals to insecticides, (Gasby & Smith, 2016, p. 253). The book details the cycles of a families dedication to their beloved member who is deteriorating along with truths conveyed about the medical science field and corporate profit. I'm happy Dan reports that despite this terrible mental disease, Barbara remains a beautiful shining light!
Reference
Gasby, Dan., Smith, Barbara (2016). Before I Forget: Love, Hope, Help, and Acceptance In Our Fight Against Alzheimer’s. Published by Harmony Books.
5 people found this helpful
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Deborah Hagler Wong
5.0 out of 5 stars Puts A Loving Face on Alzheimer's
Reviewed in the United States on November 21, 2017
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Beautifully and lovingly written, puts a human face on Alzheimer's. B. (who has the disease)starts each chapter about what she is going through, just a small bit, before her husband Dan takes over about what he is experiencing as a caregiver. His descriptions of the progress of the disease are chilling, and often terrifying. There are some valuable chapters on research, including the history of research as it concerns Black Americans. The one constant woven through this book like a golden thread is the love that Dan has for B., and that he would go to any and all lengths to help her fight the disease - or, at least enable her live with it as best she can. An important book for all generations, as most of us will be touched by Alzheimer's, in one way or another, in our lifetimes.
9 people found this helpful
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Jerry R. Blackerby
5.0 out of 5 stars Get involved
Reviewed in the United States on May 10, 2017
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I have read several excellent books about people with Alzheimer's and this is one of the best. B. Smith and her husband jointly write the book with the assistance of a professional editor. Well done and very interesting. The husband does a lot of research on the subject and has several interesting suggestions. One I totally agree with is the suggestion that more people become involved in testing programs. Without enough people willing to volunteer for the testing programs, breakthroughs will be longer coming. That is part of why I became involved in the A4 Study program about a year ago. Another excellent suggestion is to get people who currently hide the Alzheimer's patient by not going to the doctor to go to the doctor. The sooner people get diagnosed, the better chance that when a breakthrough medication becomes available, it will be able to be effective.
6 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Amazon Customer
3.0 out of 5 stars remember this is from one person's perspective
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 29, 2020
Verified Purchase
It was interesting to read from a carer's perspective, and also to read reflections from a person living with dementia - it brought home the reality of how differing these perceptions can be, and how important it is to make sure that you do not assume you know what the other person wants or is thinking
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FireOpal1
5.0 out of 5 stars Informative
Reviewed in Canada on April 22, 2017
Verified Purchase
Excellent source of information for families and care givers dealing with persons effected by diseases of memory loss. Plenty of research updates, helpful Web sites and materials to reference for knowledge.
Based on true experiences and daily challenges faced when
Living with these diseases. Straight forward and honest about the trials and heartbreak this format of disease has on all those involved with the afflicted
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Simon Smithyman
5.0 out of 5 stars Full of Information!
Reviewed in Canada on August 9, 2019
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This smooth-read is deep. Easy to read, the depth of knowledge and revelatory stories helped me identify and understand just that much more. I’ll be reading this again.
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D. A. Talbot
4.0 out of 5 stars Happens in real life everyday
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 8, 2020
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So true to life
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JB Molnar
4.0 out of 5 stars Informative, profound and touching.
Reviewed in Canada on May 10, 2017
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I liked that the author wrote from personal experience, dealing with the onset and care of his wife as they discovered she had Alzheimer's. That he researched what he could and stayed informed about what is being done to combat it, and that he chose to continue to love her and support her as she fades away, being grateful for each day they have together. My grandmother faded away from this awful disease, even going through a violent stage, it was heart wrenching.
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