The first time I tried to read this, I gave up during the first chapter, finding it weird. Thankfully, a friend whose opinion I respect kept urging me to read it and telling me I would love it, so eventually I did read it, and since then have bought all forms of it and re-read it about 8 times. Every time I do, I 'get' more of it and have an amazing breakthrough in my life. The only quibble I have with the book, apart from what some of the more negative reviewers have said about the dialogue, is that I would like the authors to have given citations for each thing the Philosopher says Adler said, because I have tried finding some of this stuff in Adler's books and have often failed. But whether or not these were Adler's ideas or actually Kishimi's ideas, they are very valuable. For example, I used to feel devastated that one of my loved ones dislikes me and tends to say things to me that feel deeply wounding. Whenever that would happen, I would be overwhelmed with anguish and pain, and sometimes it would leave me feeling deeply depressed, and NOTHING would work to shift it. When I read this book, I suddenly saw that how my loved one feels about me and what they say/do is not actually my 'task' (my business), and that it is nothing for me to worry about, and that my relationship with my loved one in no way depends on those things; it is my loved one's 'task', not mine, and there is nothing wrong with them and nothing wrong with me either, we are both human beings being human, and that was it! Where there had been extreme trauma, anguish, a feeling of needing my loved one to like me and not say x or y things to me, now I feel boundless love and confidence in my loved one, and wow, MY OWN shift created a beautiful shift in my relationship with my loved one. Had I remained mired in seeing myself as a traumatised victim (BTW, everyone else in my life was of the option that that loved one really IS out to get me, and that my loved one DOES say vicious things to hurt me, and some still think that!), I would still be suffering terribly. But thanks to this incredible book, I am free of all that stuff, and can't 'unsee' what I've seen thanks to this book, and in particular, the "separation of tasks" idea. ! There is a lot more in the book than just the "separation of tasks" idea, and perhaps that idea would not have made such an impression on me without the context of the rest of the book, including the stuff about seeing everyone as a comrade and having unconditional confidence in everyone, and horizontal versus vertical relationships, and so on, but wow this book feels valuable to me. The sheer joy and aliveness I feel from no longer being gripped by feelings of needing others to be other than they are is immense! Love is such a delight to feel! I am so glad my friend kept telling me to persevere with it! HIGHLY recommended.